Daryl Shan
by S.L. Gibbs
Summary: We all thought Darren was a boy, but then he woke up with monstrous breasts. Evra finds himself falling for this new Darren, while Xan likes male Darren. And then there's Steve who loves Darren, no matter what his gender.
1. Breasts

**UPDATE, PLEASE READ: **To be honest I hate this fic now. I don't think it started out too bad and there are some chapters that were okay but most of this fic is just...strange. Also some of my A/Ns are a really odd. But I'm not going to edit/remove anything because it's one of my most popular fics. Also I would recommend just skipping chapter 19 as it's basically just ignored in the next chapters.

* * *

**Hi, all. And hi again to anyone who also read my last fic, The Random Adventures of Darren Shan 8D I was all sad about finishing it so I thought of this last night when I was falling asleep XD I hope you all enjoy this one aswell :) By the way, Xan is me in _Saga of Darren Shan _form XD Disclaimer time.**

Darren: SL-nee-sama doesn't own me or _The Saga of Darren Shan _in anyway.

SL: Thanks, Darren. I missed you 8D

Darren: It's only been a day since The Random Adventures finished.

SL: You're supposed to say "I missed you too" T_T

* * *

Well, this is weird_,_ Darren thought. I have breasts. Why do I have breasts?

"Evra!" Darren called.

Evra mumbled something about goldfish so Darren got up and shook him.

"Evra!" He yelled again. "Wake up!"

"What do you want?" Evra moaned, his eyes still closed.

"Open your eyes."

Evra did as he was told. He burst out laughing.

"Funny."

"It's not a joke - they're real." Darren told him.

Evra laughed more. "Pretty funny but what are those things?"

Evra sat up and felt Darren's breasts. He recoiled when he realized how real they felt.

"What the…?"

"See, I told you they're real."

"But how…?"

"I don't know."

"What about your…is it still there?"

"I-I don't know."

"Well, check!"

Darren crawled into the corner of the tent.

"Don't look!" He cried.

"Sorry." Evra murmured.

Darren pulled his pants down to discover that his manhood was indeed gone. In it's place was, er, that thing that girls have.

"Can I look now?" Evra had his hands over his eyes.

Darren pulled his pants up. "Yeah."

"Well?" Evra pushed when Darren didn't say anything.

"I'm a girl!" Darren cried.

Evra started laughing again.

"It isn't funny!"

After a couple of minutes, Evra's laughing fit finally ended. "S-sorry."

Darren threw a pillow at him. "Now, help me figure out how this happened."

Evra's voice turned to a whisper. "Maybe it was the new girl to the Cirque, Xan."

"The cat-girl? What makes you think that?" Darren enquired.

"I've heard rumours that she's descended from witches," Evra explained. "You must have done something to pee her off."

"But I don't even know…ah, crap."

"What?"

"On her first day at the Cirque, I accidentally stepped on her tail."

Evra laughed. "That's rich!"

Darren punched the snake-boy playfully. "So, what do we do?"

"Nothing," Evra replied simply. "She's not going to change you back. Looks like you're a girl now, _Daryl _Shan."

* * *

Xan watched as female Darren whined and hit his friend with pillows. She grinned triumphantly.

"It worked," She whispered to herself before skipping off to her own tent.


	2. Roommate

**I got the idea for this chapter last night when I was falling asleep. I find it creepy that I get my best ideas when I'm lying in bed o.O Last night I got two new ideas for fics aswell but I'll wait until I've finished this one. I'm also homeschooled now so I've got a lot of time to write fanfiction ;D By the way, thankyou all for your reviews and favourites - they made me feel special 8D Time for the disclaimer, this time done by FemDarren ;)**

Daryl: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. She does own me though ;)

SL: Thanks, Daryl ^_^ At least _you_ appreciate me. *Glares at male Darren*

Darren: All I said was that we'd only been apart for a day so I didn't miss you. T_T

SL: *Bursts into tears*

Daryl: Now look what you've done, male me! You made SL-nee-sama sad D;

* * *

Darren and Evra were sat in their tent; both staring at Darren's newly formed balloon breasts. Every few seconds, Evra would reach out to touch them but Darren would slap his hands away. This went on for some time until Darren said,

"If I'm a girl now, then you and I can't share a tent anymore."

"Why not?" Evra whined.

"Because you'll try to do perverted stuff to me!"

"I won't!"

Darren gave his friend a look.

"Alright, I probably would." He admitted.

"I'm going to ask Mr. Tall for a new roommate."

Mr. Tall wasn't even surprised by Darren's sudden gender swap – apparently he'd seen much stranger things in his time. Instead of asking about it, Mr. Tall just pointed him, er, her in the direction of a small tent that was a little way away from all the others.

"Er, hi, I'm Darren – I mean, Daryl. I'm your new-" Darren's voice broke off when he saw the red-headed girl inside the tent.

"Welcome, _Daryl."_

"Xan?" Darren gasped.

"Come in and sit down," Darren hesitantly did as he was told. "Would you like some tea?"

"Alright, Xan, why did you do this to me?" Darren fired.

"Do what?" Xan asked innocently.

"You know what!" Darren yelled. "You turned my…into a…"

At that moment, Xan reminded Darren of a Cheshire cat. She was grinning wickedly and her tail was moving behind her head. "What makes you think it was me?"

Darren backed away. "Evra t-told me that…"

"That I'm descended from witches? You can't believe everything you hear, Daryl."

As Xan was creeping towards him, Darren was finding it hard _not _to believe it.

"What's wrong, Daryl? You seem uncomfortable."

"I am!" Darren cried.

"You don't have to be, we're roomies!" She chuckled.

"Alright, Xan, cut the crap. Tell me why you did this."

"I don't know," Xan jeered. "Maybe I just like you."

Darren blushed. "Well, if you like me then why did you change me into a _girl?"_

Xan laughed and tapped her nose. "Anyway, we've got to change you out of those clothes – you can't dress like a _guy._ You can borrow some of my clothes until we can get you some."

"Can't you just change me back?"

"Do you _really_ think I'm going to?"

"No."

* * *

"Hey, Evra!" Darren smiled when he saw his ex-roommate.

"D-Darren," Evra was blushing. "You look…different."

Female Darren was wearing a short, black dress that clung to him – her – like a second skin. Evra could now see that Darren's private parts weren't the only things that had changed – he (she) was also a lot curvier.

"It's Daryl," Darren corrected him. "Do you like it? Xan let me borrow some of her clothes."

"Xan?"

"She's my new roommate."

As if on cue, Xan appeared and hooked Darren's arm with her own.

"Hey, roomie!" She said. "Hey, Evra." She mumbled with less enthusiasm.

"So are we going to eat or what?" Darren said.

"As long as I don't have to sit next to cat-girl, she might put me off my food." Evra scoffed.

Xan only smirked. "You know, it's not wise to mess with me. You could wind up like our friend, Daryl here."

"There's not much you could to do me," Evra challenged. "I'm already half-snake and I've always wondered what it's like to be a girl."

"That's what you think." Xan murmured.

* * *

**Ooooh, what's Xanny up to? You'll have to stick with me to find out ;)**

**No, that's a rubbish cliffhanger. I don't even know what she's going to do and when I do figure it out it probably wont be all that exciting. But please stick with me anyway**

**I love you guys ;D**

_-SL-nee-sama_


	3. The Princess and The Frog

**Hi, there. Before I begin I'd like to say thanks to **_ferretgirlsz _**and **_yami kirsty _**for being the _only _people that reviewed. You guys don't love me anymore D: But thankyou to those who added this story to their favourites aswell. Anyway, time for the disclaimer.**

Xan: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. Or me.

SL: Yes, I do own you T_T

Xan: No, you don't. I belong to Darren.

SL: ...yeah, you believe that.

* * *

"Darren, what has happened to you?" Mr. Crepsley asked.

Daryl shrugged and laughed awkwardly. "I'm a girl now, I guess. Call me Daryl."

"Well, um, okay, Daryl."

_Ribbit! Ribbit!_

"What's that?" Daryl enquired.

_Ribbit! Ribbit!_

Then she saw it. There was a frog on the floor, looking up at her. There was something weird about this frog, she noticed. It kind of reminded her of-

_Ribbit! Ribbit!_

"Okay, little guy," Daryl laughed. "Let's go find out who you belong to."

Daryl decided she would show the frog to Evra first – maybe he'd help her find the frog's owner. But Evra wasn't in his tent. Daryl couldn't find him anywhere. So instead she went to find Xan.

"Hey, Xan," Daryl said. "Have you seen Evra?"

"Why, yes I have." Xan replied. Oh no, Daryl thought. She has her Cheshire cat smile on her face – that's never a good sign.

"Well, where is he?" Daryl asked.

"Where is he?" Xan repeated. "Why, Daryl, I think he is here among us."

"What do you mean-?"

"Look inside the palm of your hand."

Daryl's eyes fell to her cupped hands. Inside them was the scalely green creature she had picked up earlier. It took her a while to realize what Xan was getting at but when she did, she cried, "Xan, you didn't!"

"I did." Xan smirked.

"Change him back!" Daryl exclaimed.

"Oh, I can't change him back," Xan chuckled. "Daryl, have you heard the story of the princess and the frog?"

"Yeah, but what does that have to do with…?" Darren gagged when he realized what Xan was referring to. "Ew, you mean I have to…?"

Xan nodded.

Daryl lifted the frog up to her face and muttered, "Evra, you owe me big time." before pursing her lips and planting one on the frog-boy.

* * *

"Hey, Daryl. Thanks again for changing me back." Evra smiled.

"Thanks isn't going to cut it, you owe me." Daryl replied.

"But you liked it, right?" Evra winked.

Daryl tried to hide her blush. "Ew, no! It was vile – you were a frog!"

"But if I weren't, you would've loved it." Evra grinned.

Daryl pushed him playfully. "You wish!"

"Oh, yeah? How about you plant one on me right now?"

Xan was in between them faster than the speed of light once she heard that.

"Daryl won't be planting one on anyone, especially not a disgusting snake-boy like you. Now we've got a tonne of chores to do so quit flapping your jaws."


	4. Bored

****

Hey, guess what, guys? A good way to get your Cirque du Freak fic read and reviewed is to review mine. I have this creepy habit of stalking the people who review my fics and another creepy habit I have is reviewing everything I read. And not just once. Every. Single. Chapter. So review, da? ;D Do it for Evra.

**Oh, and, who do you guys want Darren to end up with? Do you want him to stay a girl and end up with Evra or do you want Xanny to change him back into a dude and him to end up with her? Tell me in le reviews or send me a message 8D**

**If you read my last fic, you know how much I love Steve so he'll be joining us for the disclaimer today.**

Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: Good boy. *Pats head* I missed you.

Steve: You still scare me T_T But Darren will be ending up with no-one, he's mine.

S.L.: Don't worry, honey! You can have him in the next fic.

Steve: ;D Remember, that's a promise.

* * *

Daryl, Evra and Xan were sitting on the grass outside Daryl and Xan's tent. Well, Daryl and Evra were sitting. Xan was floating. Literally.

"Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored," Evra muttered.

"Well, we're all bored but saying it doesn't make it any better." Daryl replied.

"I'm not," Xan cried from above them. "This is so fun!"

"Well, we can't all do that," Daryl murmured in response.

"Yeah, we're not all witches in training!" Evra added.

"I am _not _a witch!" Xan spat.

"Well, what do you call people who turn boys into girls and snake-boys into frogs?" Evra retorted.

Xan had to think about that one. "Talented people."

Evra grinned. "If I had your powers, I know what I'd do."

* * *

"_Hey, Xan," Evra smiled._

_Xan bowed. "Oh, hello, Evra, the most handsome snake-boy on this planet."_

"_Here, drink this." Evra handed Xan a cup of a glowing, green liquid._

"_Oh, thankyou, Evra!" Xan exclaimed before taking of sip of the peculiar drink. She instantly disappeared. _

* * *

"Oh, Evra!" Daryl slapped the snake-boy's arm. "That's mean!"

"Daryl, she turned you into a girl and me into a frog. I don't think I'm the one who's mean." Evra responded as he rubbed his arm where the petite girl had hit him. "Anyway, I know what else I'd do."

Of course he didn't say this part out loud.

* * *

"_Hello, Beautiful." Evra smirked._

_Daryl blushed. "Oh, hi, Evra."_

_Evra made pointless conversation with the boy-turned-girl as he secretly dropped a few drops of something into her drink. When Daryl drank it, she turned to Evra with a huge smile on her face._

"_Evra, I love you!" She cried._

"_I love you too!"_

* * *

Evra shook himself out of his daydreams. "Daryl, what would you do?"

"I'd change myself back into a guy, I guess. Maybe I'd go back in time to see my friends and family." She answered.

"Why would you want to be a guy again? You make such a cute girl." Evra said.

Daryl blushed. "You think so?"

Evra blushed too although he wasn't sure why. "Yeah,"

Daryl smiled silently at her ex-roommate.

Xan plopped down in between them.

"Xan!" Evra yelled. "You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Well, quit flirting with Daryl!" Xan shouted.

Evra felt his cheeks get hot again. "I wasn't flirting! I was just complimenting her!"

"Complimenting her, my tail," Xan growled but when she turned to Daryl her voice was soft. "Shall we go into our tent, Daryl? Where the nasty snake-boy can't get you?"

Daryl giggled and nodded. "Sorry, Evra. See you later."


	5. Love Potion

**Hi, hi. This chapter features Xanny more because I haven't really said much about her. But if you wanna know more about her then you can ask me or I have a bio on my page. Oh, and I'd also like to send a super-awesome-mega-thankyou to **_ferretgirlsz _**for reviewing every chapter so far. And **_Ozuma thy Awesome _**for rewieving and making my little Steve-xiao-tu happy with the last chapter of his fic 8D And also thanks to anyone else who reviewed and/or added this story to their favourites/alert.**

**Disclaimer:**

Darren: SL-nee-sama doesn't own me, _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. But I do love her very much and wish she would forgive me T_T

SL: *Pats head* Okay, I forgive you.

* * *

So, I'm in love with Darren. Xan had never admitted it to herself before but it was the truth – she loved Darren Shan.

That's why she had changed him into a girl. She knew that female Darren would most likely end up being her roommate. So she had changed his gender in an attempt to get to know him and spend more time with him.

It had worked. Partially. The only thing was that since Darren was a girl, guys were starting to take an interest in her. And by guys, Xan meant one guy. Evra. He was always with them! The only way they could be alone was if they went inside their tent.

Naturally, Darren was with Evra right then and Xan was in the tent alone.

There was always the option of changing Darren back into a boy. But he would probably stop hanging out with her all together then. She could do a break-up spell on him and Evra? No, he would never forgive her if he found out.

Ah, hell. Xan thought. What am I going to do?

Then she felt something wet dripping down her cheek. Was she crying? She couldn't be! Witches didn't cry. She laughed at herself. And witches didn't fall in love with half-vampires either.

She laughed again. Then she said aloud,

"That...that Darren. Of course I'm not in love with him, but a little love potion wouldn't hurt."

* * *

"Hey, Daryl, hey, Evra," Xan said cheerfully.

"Hey, Xan!" Daryl replied, just as cheerfully.

"Hey." Evra mumbled.

"Daryl, I thought you might be thirsty. I bought you some water." Xan pushed the 'water' in Daryl's direction.

"Thanks, Xan!" Daryl replied, taking the bottle enthusiastically.

"Hey, Daryl! Don't drink that! It might be-!"

Evra was too late. Daryl had already taken a big chug of the liquid and was now looking at Xan with adoring eyes.

"Er, Xan?"

"Yes, Daryl?"

"Can I take you out sometime? Like on a date?"

"Sure!"

"Really? Great!" Daryl said before skipping off happily.

Xan gave Evra a little smirk before she started off in the direction that Daryl had just ran off too.

* * *

**Le gasp! Darren thinks he's in love with Xan! Will Xan get her Darren? Or will Evra find a way to break the spell? Find out next time on *turns dramatically to the camera and raises one eyebrow* Daryl Shan!**


	6. Midnight Kiss

**Thankyou for le reviews on the last chapter 8D I'm kind of on a fanfic streak now so you get two chapters in a row ;D Now, we shall find out if Evra breaks the spell. But first, Evra shall do my disclaimer because he hasn't done it yet. Sorry for forgetting you, Evra-kun! D;**

**Disclaimer:**

Evra: SL-nee-sama doesn't own me, _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: Good boy. Here's a cookie.

* * *

Evra searched frantically through Xan's belongings. He was looking for something, anything, that would help him break her spell on Daryl. But all he found was a whole lot of underwear (He was resisting the urge to take one of Daryl's bras).

But then he saw it. Underneath a pile of panties that he guessed were Xan's was...

"The Big Book of Witchcraft?" He laughed. "How cheesy!"

He looked up love potions. Sure enough, there was the one that Xan must have used. But underneath it in fine print, it said: '_**Beware! **__If the maiden is kissed by a handsome prince at midnight, the spell will be broken!' _

"Double cheesy." He murmured.

Evra figured that it didn't have to be a handsome prince to kiss the maiden i.e. Daryl. A drop-dead gorgeous snakeboy i.e. him, would probably do. So he smiled to himself and muttered, "I'm going to kiss Daryl." before getting the hell out of Xan's tent before she returned.

* * *

Darren watched Xan silently as she grinned at him and wiggled her tail. He liked Xan but was he in love with her? He felt like he was being forced to love her, if that made sense. His mind was saying _I'm so in love! She's the one! _But his heart was saying something else.

"You ready to go?"

"Uh, oh, yeah."

Darren glanced back at the Cirque du Freak. He wished Evra could come along with them, then it would be less awkward. But he knew deep down that it was a date, Evra couldn't come. So he sighed and followed Xan into the night.

* * *

Evra secretly followed Daryl and Xan around like an animal stalking it's prey. He wasn't very good at snooping so he was surprised that the half-vampire with super-awesome hearing and the I-never-miss-anything witch hadn't turned around yet. But they hadn't, and it was almost midnight.

That must be what Xan's planning, Evra thought. She's keeping her out until midnight just in case I figured out how to break the spell. But how will I get to Daryl in time? Xan's watching her like a hawk.

Evra didn't have to think about it for too long. Daryl had said something to Xan and now she was walking towards him. She bent down to the bush he was hiding in and whispered,

"Hi, Evra."

Evra laughed awkwardly. "I guess you caught me."

Daryl shushed him. "Xan doesn't know you're here. Now, why are you here?"

"It's Xan. That water she gave you – it was some kind of love potion." Evra explained. "I'm here to break the spell."

Daryl seemed taken aback for a moment."I thought she might've done something like that. Now, how are you going to break this spell?"

Evra was about to answer but his eyes fell to his watch. It was midnight! In one quick motion he stood up, placed his hands on Daryl's shoulders and gave her a smooch that was longer than necessary.

Xan came rushing over.

"No!" She cried dramatically.

"Yes." Evra smirked.

"Xan," Daryl growled. "You put a love spell on me!"

"I-I'm sorry," Xan stammered. "Please don't be mad!"

Daryl rolled her eyes. "Just don't do anything like this again."

"I wont." Xan said but she had her finger's crossed behind her back.


	7. The Menstrual Cycle

**This chapter is in honor of the evil curse that is put on us females called "The Period" T_T Disclaimer time.**

**Disclaimer:**

Xina: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. She does own me and Xanny though.

Xan: Speak for yourself! And don't call me Xanny!

* * *

Daryl was extremely freaked out. The reason being that the night before, Evra – her best friend before she had been turned into a girl – had _kissed _her. She hadn't said anything about it at the time but now she was seriously stressing out.

She was about to put on some clean clothes when she caught sight of something that scared the hell out of her. She screamed.

* * *

Xan and Evra burst into the tent and there stood Daryl, completely naked. Evra blushed and left the tent, deciding that Xan was best to deal with this crisis.

"Daryl, what's wrong?" Xan asked.

"T-there's blood in my panties!" She cried.

Xan laughed. "Put some clothes on and we'll talk about it."

After Daryl had put her clothes on, Xan explained to her all about the menstrual cycle. Daryl's facial expression went from terrified, to slightly freaked, to totally grossed out. When Xan had finished talking, Daryl looked at her and asked,

"How on earth do you girls survive?"

Xan laughed again. "You get used to it." She said before tossing a couple of feminine hygiene products at Daryl. "Those are to stop the blood from leaking."

"Ew," Daryl murmured in response.

* * *

"Daryl!" Evra cried. "What was wrong? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, everything's fine now, although my stomach hurts a little. And do we have any chocolate?"

Xan giggled. "Let's go into town and buy you some."

"Yay!" Daryl exclaimed before skipping off.

"Has she…?" Evra whispered to Xan.

"Yeah."

* * *

"What kind do you want?" Xan asked.

"Caramel," Daryl replied, almost jumping up and down with the anticipation.

Xan paid the shop-keeper before following a happy Daryl outside into the streets. It seems that Daryl was a little too happy because she accidentally ran straight into a girl that happened to be passing by.

"Ow! I'm sorry," Daryl said as she helped the girl to her feet.

"Oh, it's okay, I-" The girl's voice broke off when she saw the red-haired girl stood behind Daryl. "Xan?"

"Xina?" Xan echoed.

"You two know each other?" Daryl said.

"We're sisters." Xina answered.

They did look alike. They both had the same dark eyes and red hair. Although Xan's was long and flowed down to her waist but Xina's was tied up into two pigtails.

"Xan, I didn't know you had a sister," Daryl said conversationally.

"I don't, not anymore." Xan spat before storming off in the direction of the Cirque du Freak.


	8. Xina

**Yay! Thankyou for the reviews! Now we get to find out why Xanny is so mad at Xina ;D I really cannot help but to update this story - I'm homeschooled so I have nothing better to do XD**

**Disclaimer:**

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: And?

Chibi Steve: I promise not to kill Mr. Crepsley, Shancus or any other vampire/human.

* * *

"I've never seen Xan act like that," Daryl told Xina as the two of them walked back to the Cirque du Freak together. "I'm worried about her."

"There's no need to worry," Xina replied. "Xan and I have had a few…problems. I guess she's still holding a grudge against me."

"Oh," Daryl murmured, seeming taken aback for a moment. "I never did properly introduce myself, did I? I'm Daryl – Xan and I are roommates at the Cirque du Freak."

"So, that's what Xan's been doing? Performing in a freak show?" Xina said. "I'm Xina, although you probably guessed."

"Nice to meet you, Xina." Daryl smiled.

* * *

"Hey, Daryl? Does Xan seem a little…different to you?" Evra said.

"What do you mean by that?" Daryl replied.

"She seems…nice."

Daryl laughed. "Oh, you must be confusing her with Xina."

"Xina?"

"Her twin sister."

Evra was silent for a moment. Then he laughed. "Good one, Daryl. You nearly had me there."

"I'm serious," Daryl responded. "Xan does have a twin sister; we met her in town earlier."

"Yeah, right. Funny!"

* * *

Xan was lying face-down in her tent sulking. She was remembering what life had been like before she had ran away from home to join the Cirque du Freak.

She had been a naughty child, even before she had learned to use her magic. She would pull the other girls' hair at play group and break expensive vases, just because she knew how important they had been to her mother.

Xina had been the only person she had cared about. Xina was the only person who loved her unconditionally, even when she broke her dolls and tore her dresses.

But once Xan and Xina had turned 13, they had been taught how to use their magic. Xan had favoured black magic, while Xina practiced white magic. So one day, Xan had cast a spell. A very dangerous one, at that. Xina had been the only person she had told, Xina blabbed and she had been kicked out of her Circle. Simple.

After that, her parents tried to hide it but they resented her. So she'd run away, blaming Xina for it all.

"It _was_ her fault," Xan muttered to herself. "I don't still love her. I _don't."_


	9. An Embrace

**Thankyou to **_ferretgirlsz _**for being the only person who reviewed the last chapter and for reviewing every chapter so far. **

**Disclaimer:**

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

Evra: What's he doing back again? He's not even in the story and he's done the disclaimer more times than me!

SL: Hey! I've just written a whole fic about you! Isn't that enough?

Evra: The fic was all about ways to annoy me!

SL: Okay, I see your point. You can do the disclaimer next time, okay?

Evra: You better remember T_T

* * *

"Xan," Evra said as he approached Xina.

"Oh, I'm not Xan. I'm her twin sister, Xina." Xina replied as she lifted her hand up for Evra to shake. Evra ignored it so she awkwardly brought it back down to her side.

"Seriously, Xan, what's with this twin sister crap?" Evra asked.

"We're not trying to pull a joke on you," Xina assured him. "I am Xan's twin sister."

"Yeah, right…" He said sarcastically. Then he grinned when an idea struck him. "If you're not Xan, then how would you like to go on a date with me?"

Xina smiled. "Sure. How about tomorrow night?"

* * *

Daryl crept into her tent. Lying face-down on the floor was Xan, and her pillow was wet. Daryl gently tapped her friend's shoulder. She got a low moan of annoyance in response.

"Xan?" Daryl whispered. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Xan murmured into her pillow.

"Xan, don't lie to me. You're upset about Xina being here," Daryl said. "Why?"

Xan sighed and sat up. "I can't lie to you, Daryl." She said before beginning to tell Daryl the story of her and her twin sister's fight. When she was done, Daryl did something she never would have expected: she brought her into an embrace.

"D-Daryl…" Xan stammered.

"Sorry," Daryl said as she let go of her friend. "I just don't like it when my friends are upset."

Xan felt her cheeks get hot. Was she blushing? She'd never blushed in her entire life! "I-it's okay," She replied. "You made me feel a little better."

Daryl smiled. "I'm glad. But listen, I'm not going to tell you what to do about Xina but I think you should make up with her. She seems to miss you."

Xan thought about that for a moment. "I-I'll think about it."


	10. First Date

**The last chapter was pretty short so I think you guys deserve this XD And I got quite a few reviews on the last chapter so thankyou for those ;D**

**Disclaimer:**

Evra: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. P.S. Don't read her fic about me.

SL: Thanks, Evra! You just advertised my fic even more ;D

Evra:...shoot.

* * *

Evra was in his tent; contemplating what to wear for his date with Xan. He still didn't believe that Xan had a twin sister – he was determined to catch her out on their date.

Should he dress up? Or wear something casual? He didn't want to look lazy but on the other hand he didn't want to look like he was trying too hard.

Wait, this was Xan he was thinking about! Why should he care what she thought of him? But still, it was a date, his first date at that. So it wouldn't hurt to make an effort. In the end he settled for a pair of jeans and a black T-shirt.

* * *

Xina was excited. She had only been at the Cirque du Freak for two days and she already had a date. The guy was always confusing her with her twin sister, Xan but he seemed nice. He also had green skin and scales, she made a mental note to ask him about that later.

She was sat on a hill, looking out on the Cirque du Freak when she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around.

"Y-you ready to go?" It was her date, Evra. His green skin went slightly purple as his eyes shifted from her to the ground.

"Sure." She smiled.

He then helped her to her feet and led her away from the Cirque.

"I've been meaning to ask you," She began as they walked into town together. "What's with these?" She trailed her fingers along the scales on his face.

The boy laughed. "I'm a snake-boy."

"Snake-boy?" She echoed. "So you're like me and Xan. We're both cat-girls."

"Yeah," He agreed but then he shook his head violently to clear it. "Xan, when are you going to stop playing this game?"

"I'm not Xan," Xina replied with a hint of annoyance in her voice. "Why are you so convinced that I'm Xan? Maybe you should be on a date with her instead, since you like to talk about her so much."

"What are you saying?" Evra yelled. "That I'm in love with Xan?"

"You sure seem like you are." Xina murmured.

Evra was silent for a moment. Then he looked up at Xina, seeing her properly for the first time. "You really aren't Xan, are you?"

"That's what I've been trying to tell you this whole time!" Xina exclaimed.

Evra laughed. "I'm sorry; I should have seen how different the two of you are. I'm willing to continue this date if you are. Oh, and for the record – I'm not in love with Xan."


	11. Personality Tutor

**Yay! This is one of my longest chapters ever! I apologize for my very short chapters, but it is a crack fic so I don't want to cram too much into one chapter DX **

**Anyway, I'd like to shout out to **_Ozuma thy Awesome _**for being, well, awesome. Thanks, dude, for your reviews and stuffs. Also thankyou to everyone else who has reviewed, put this story on alert or added this story to their favourites. Did I mention I love y'all? 8D **

**Disclaimer:**

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own-

Evra: SL-nee-sama, we've all discussed this and we think that we should seperate you from Steve.

SL: What? When did you discuss this? Stevey-poo is mine! Mine I tell you!

Evra: Darren, grab her.

*Darren and Xan drag me away, kicking and screaming*

Evra: Anyway, SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

Chibi Steve: I still get my pot roast, right?

* * *

_Xina was crying. Xan hated to see her twin cry, especially when she knew it was her fault. Xina's new doll that she had gotten from Grandma was now bald and missing an arm. She held it in one hand and wiped her snotty nose with the other. Xan turned to walk away but stopped dead in her tracks when she heard someone calling her name._

"_Xan?" It was her mother. "Did you do this to Xina's doll?"_

_Xan nodded. _

_Xan's mother sighed. "Xan, what are we going to do with you? You cause trouble, we punish you, then you cause more trouble! It's like we're in some kind of continuous cycle!"_

"_Mummy," Xina whispered through her tears. "It's alright. Xan probably didn't mean to do it," Then she walked over to her sister and took her hands. "It's okay, Xan. Don't worry about it."_

_Xan didn't say anything, she just smiled. Xina smiled back._

* * *

Xan smiled at the memory as she brushed her red hair. Maybe Daryl was right – maybe it would be best if she made up with Xina. It would be nice to have a sort of family again. But apologizing to people wasn't one of the many things she was good at. She put her brush down and sighed.

"Maybe I should learn how to be nicer to people." She said out loud.

* * *

"Yo, Snakey!" Xan called.

Evra turned around and gave Xan a look of annoyance. "Who you calling Snakey?"

Xan ignored his question. "Teach me how to be nice."

Evra laughed. "Why on earth would I help you?"

"Because Daryl is missing one of her bras and if you don't help me, I'll tell her where it went." Xan whispered.

Evra sighed in defeat. "Why do you want to learn how to be nice anyway?"

Xan looked at the ground. "Why do you want to know?" She asked lamely.

"For Daryl?" Evra guessed.

"Yes, but also because I want to make up with Xina." She answered truthfully.

"Alright, I'll help you," Evra said, although he knew he had no choice. "But I don't know why since you're always horrible to me."

* * *

"Hey, Daryl," Xina said as she approached her new friend. "Have you seen Xan or Evra anywhere?"

"No, Xan was in our tent a while ago but I haven't seen her since." Daryl replied.

"Evra and I went on a date last night but he hasn't spoken to me since." Xina murmured.

"You went on a date with Evra?" Daryl gasped.

Xina shrugged in an attempt to look casual. "Yeah."

Daryl laughed. "I can't believe he didn't tell me! Anyway, don't worry about him – he's just shy. I bet he really likes you."

Xina smiled. "Thanks, Daryl."

Daryl smiled back. "No problem. Since Evra and Xan aren't around, want to go get something to eat together?"

"Sure."

* * *

When Daryl and Xina had gotten back from a fast food place in town, they were surprised to see Evra and Xan waiting for them. Xan ran up to hug both of them as soon as she saw them, whereas Evra walked slowly behind her.

"Hey, Daryl, hey, Xina," Xan beamed.

"Er, hey, Xan..." Daryl replied, confused by Xan's sudden change of attitude.

Xina, on the other hand, didn't care. She was just happy that her sister was finally acknowledging her existence again. "Hey, Xan!" She cried.

Xan smiled and gave her sister a second hug. "Come on – we've got so much catching up to do!" She said before grabbing her sister's hand and pulling her towards her tent.

"What did you do to her?" Daryl asked, stunned.

Evra chuckled. "I just helped her out a little."


	12. Fantasy World

**So, I haven't updated in forever because I've been lazy and this chapter doesn't really make up for it cuz it's sucky in my opinon. But enjoy. Or not.**

SL: *Rolls on the floor all secret agent like* My target is in sight.

Evra: Not anymore! *Picks me up* No Steve for you!

SL: Evra, you meanie! Put me down!

Chibi Steve: I want my pot roast.

Xina: *Pops up out of nowhere* SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

* * *

"I want to know what you did to Xan and I want to know now." Daryl said, folding her arms.

"I told you! I just taught her how to be nice!" Evra replied, rolling his eyes.

"Xan wouldn't be that nice to someone even if they got hit by a truck," Daryl half-joked. "You used one of her potions, didn't you?"

Evra laughed, won over by how cute Daryl looked when she pouted. "Fine, you're right."

"I want you to undo it."

Evra frowned. "Why?"

"Because she's just...not Xan when she's like this."

Neither of them said anything for a moment then.

"Daryl, you're not...in love with her, are you?"

"Of course not!" Daryl cried, trying to hide her blush. "She's just my friend! Of course I'm not in love with her!"

"Then who are you in love with?" Evra asked shyly.

"No-one!" Daryl lied. "Why are you asking me all these questions anyway?"

Evra shrugged. "Just curious."

* * *

"Mom and Dad were actually upset when I left?" Xan gasped.

"Of course, you're their daughter." Xina replied.

"But I didn't think that they...you know, liked me much." Xan shrugged.

Xina seemed taken aback for a moment. "I know they got mad at you sometimes but they always loved you, Xan...and they still do. Which is why you should come back home with me."

Xina wished she could take back her words when she saw the angry look on Xan's face.

"I knew it..." Xan whispered. "I knew it!" This time she said it a little louder. "I knew you'd try and take me back home! You think that I can just go home and Mom and Dad are going to welcome me with open arms! You've always lived in a fantasy word, Xina. Where everything is perfect. Life doesn't work that way! Mom and Dad don't want me, they never did and they never will. That's why I ran away. And if you think that you can fix all that then...you're more stupid than I thought."


	13. Silver Haired Boy

**I am forever in the debt of **_Ozuma thy Awesome _**for helping me with this chapter. I had total writers block and he gave me some excellent ideas. Dude, I really can't thank you enough. I am now your slave. **

**Disclaimer:**

SL: *Comes down from the ceiling on one of those rope things in the spy movies* Stevey Baby, you'll have your pot roast soon!

Evra: Oh, no, he won't. *Cuts my rope*

Darren: *Catches me so I don't land on Steve* What should I do with her, Evra?

Evra: Lock her in the cage.

SL: *A cage appears out of the floorboards* Where did that come from?

Darren: *Throws me in the cage and locks me in* Sorry, SL-nee-sama, this is for your own good.

Chibi Steve: WHERE'S MY ***BEEP***ING POT ROAST?

SL: Now, now, Steve. What did we say about language?

Evra: Hey! The whole point of us seperating you two is so that you _don't _talk to him.

Darren: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan, _any of it's characters or the epic ideas that _Ozuma thy Awesome _gave to her.

* * *

What's wrong with me? Xina thought. Why is it that everything I do upsets Xan? Unable to hold back her tears any longer, she curled up into a ball and cried her eyes out.

"Xina?" A familiar voice was calling her name. She looked up.

"Evra?"

"What's wrong?" Evra asked, taking a seat next to her.

"Xan got mad at me again." She admitted.

"The potion didn't work?" Evra muttered.

Xina didn't even bother to ask about the potion, she just started crying again. Evra hesitantly put his arm around her and laid her head on his shoulder.

"Don't worry," He whispered awkwardly. "It'll be okay."

After a couple more minutes of Xina crying and Evra awkwardly comforting her, the witch looked up at the snake boy and gave him a big kiss on the cheek without a second thought.

Evra's face turned purple. "H-huh?" was all he could manage to choke out.

Xina just laughed. "That's just my way of saying thankyou."

That got the two of them into an uncomfortable silence until a warp-hole opened and a silver-haired boy appeared in front of them. (**A/N **Lol, sorry Ozuma)

"Where's Darren?" He cried. "Where can I find Darren?"

* * *

"So, you joined the Cirque du Freak after you left and now some freaky witch chic's turned you into a girl?" The silver-haired boy (who had just introduced himself as Steve) said as Daryl nodded.

"What about you? I thought you swore to kill me?" Daryl questioned.

"Oh, I was just being dramatic when I said that," Steve shrugged. "To be honest, I wasn't nearly as upset about you becoming a vampire as I was about you leaving me. Life was pretty shit once you left." Steve then realized what he had said and laughed awkwardly. "So, eventually I met a girl who claimed she could do magic. I had nothing better going on in my life so I went with her. But one day, she said something about me belonging to someone else and then she brought me here."

"Wow, and I thought my life was weird," Daryl laughed. "Anyway, I'm glad you're here and that you don't hate me." Then Daryl brought her old friend into a tight embrace. "You know, Steve..." She paused. "I missed all my friends and family but I certainly missed you the most."

A blush crept across Steve's face and he was glad that Darren – Daryl – couldn't see it. "I-I missed you too." He stammered.

Daryl let go of her friend and smiled. "Will you be staying with the Cirque then?"

"Sure, if you'll have me." Steve answered shyly.

That did it. Daryl couldn't take it any more. She burst into hysterical laughter.

"What's so funny?" Steve asked.

"What the heck happened to you, Steve?" Darren said in between laughs. "'If you'll have me'? When I was human you used to come to my house and announce you were sleeping over all weekend, you wouldn't care if my parents approved or not."

"S-shut up!" Steve cried. Daryl continued laughing. "I'm staying whether you like it or not. Is that better?"

Daryl's laughter had now made it down to small giggles. "I guess that sounds more like you."

When Steve didn't say anything and just pouted, Daryl burst out laughing again. "C-come on," She said, still chuckling. "I think it's about time for dinner."


	14. Xan in Wonderland

**This is a crack fic. Crack fics are supposed to be random. This fic is now developing something deadly...a plot! So in this chapter there is more randomness than ever. By the way, the scene with Nameless OC was really pointless, I will explain a bit about him after this chapter.**

**Disclaimer:**

SL: I have created another OC to free me from this cage. Now, Nameless OC! Set me free!

OC: Sorry, SL-nee-sama, I can't do that.

SL: Why not?

OC: Evra said he'd be my friend if I didn't let you out.

SL: ...you're so lucky you're cute.

OC: *Uke face*

SL: Just do the disclaimer, as long as you're here.

OC: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

* * *

Steve had just left Mr. Tall's tent and now he was on his way to find out who his roommate was. He had wanted to room with Darren but since Darren was a girl now, he/she was sharing a tent with some freaky witch named Xan.

"Yo," He said as he entered his new tent. "Oh, hey, Snakey," He grinned sarcastically when he saw the green-skinned boy already inside.

"My name is Evra, not Snakey," Evra corrected.

"Whatever. Listen, I don't share well so I have a few ground rules: don't touch my stuff and don't cross over to my side of the tent." Steve commanded. "You must stay a good few metres away from me at all times. I know I'm good looking but my heart belongs to another."

Evra narrowed his eyes at the silver-haired boy. "Oh, yeah? And who's that?"

"Darren, of course," Steve winked. "Don't pretend he doesn't talk about me all the time."

"Actually, she doesn't," Evra retorted. "Because she and I are together."

"Oh, please! Darren's standards must be higher than _that_." Steve spat.

"It's true!" Evra lied. "We've been together ever since she turned into a girl. We've even kissed."

"Really?" Steve asked quietly.

Evra nodded.

"I'm going out," Steve said almost inaudibly before storming out of the tent.

_Oh, shit!_ Evra thought.

* * *

The boy with the mismatched eyes watched the other teenagers of the Cirque du Freak silently. He wished he could have friends like that. But most of the time people didn't even notice him and when they did, they'd be too freaked out by his appearance to even bother to get to know him. The fact that he had one blue eye and one green and that he had prosthetics in place of hands often put people off him.

But then, before he knew what was going on, a girl with flowing red hair and cat ears bumped into him and knocked him over.

"Hey, watch where you're going, kid!" She yelled. "Who the heck are you? I've never seen you round here before."

"S-sorry about that," He stammered. "I'm Nameless OC. Pleased to meet you."

* * *

"Hey, Daryl! I just saw a guy with hooks for hands get run over by a bus." Xan announced. (**A/N **Totally irrelevant, but I thought I'd throw this in for a certain RV hater I know)

"Really? Cool." Daryl replied. "So how did things go with you and Xina?"

"The spell wore off and now I hate her again," Xan replied nonchalantly.

"Oh."

"The Cirque is moving on tomorrow, isn't it?" Xan questioned. Daryl nodded. "Is your friend staying?"

"You mean Steve? Yeah, he's staying. What about Xina?" Daryl enquired.

Xan shrugged. "Who knows? Who cares?" Daryl frowned. "What's that you're drinking?"

"Coffee," Daryl answered.

"Coffee?" Xan echoed. "What does it taste like?"

Daryl giggled. "Here, try some."

Xan took the brown mug out of the half-vampire's hands and gulped the whole thing down. When she had finished, she had a smile on her face that would put a Cheshire cat to shame.

"Hey! I said some, not the whole thing!" Daryl laughed.

Xan just giggled like a maniac. "I like turtles."

"What?"

"Daryl, you're a vampire, right? How come you don't sparkle?"

"Huh?"

"I once had a hamster called Mr. Happy Rainbow Cupcake Guy. My brother ate it."

"Xan, you don't have a brother."

"Man, Morgan Freeman is sexy."

"The guy from _Bruce Almighty?"_

Xan was now twirling in circles. "You know who else is sexy? Mr. Crepsley. I've always had a crush on him."

Daryl tilted her head in confusion. "You're crushing on Mr. Crepsley?"

Xan giggled and pulled her skirt up. "Look, Daryl! Aren't my panties pretty?"

"Ugh…yeah. Let's go find Xina."

* * *

"You gave her coffee?" Xina cried. "That stuff makes her crazy!"

Xan knocked over the bottle of water in her twin's hand. "Look, Daryl! I made a waterfall."

"That's pretty, Xan," Daryl replied. Then to Xina she said: "But when I gave it to her it seemed like she'd never heard of it."

"We're off to see The Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Oz!"

"That's because last time she had it, it was so bad that Mom had to completely wipe her memory of the stuff." Xina explained.

"Daryl, your face is soft. Can I lick it?"

"No, honey. So when does it wear off?" Daryl asked.

"Do cats eat pineapples?"

"It usually wears off at the end of the day. The only thing is I don't have enough magic to wipe her memory when it does." Xina responded.

"I cry when people say unicorns aren't real."

"I guess we'll just have to keep her away from coffee from now on then." Daryl concluded.

"I hide the antidote to the potion I used to change Daryl into a girl under my pillow."

"What did you just say?" Daryl gasped.

"I once read a book and the last chapter was all about pubic hair." (**A/N **I actually did read a book like that)

"She keeps the antidote under her pillow!" Daryl cried. "I can be a dude again!"

* * *

**Nameless OC was orginally a blue-haired boy in a wheelchair in a dream I had a little while ago. For some reason he was living with my family and he seemed to have some sort of mental problem but I loved him to bits. I called him Kaito in my dream o.O But then my Studio Ghibli poster fell off the wall and woke me up XD So as I was lying in bed, I thought up a lot of personality traits for him. He is no longer in a wheelchair but was born without hands and he is with the Cirque because his parents died in a house fire. Despite this he is very happy and uke-ish but he doesn't have any friends. Poor Nameless-chan D: **

**Anyway, yeah. Thanks to **_Ozuma thy Awesome _**and **_ferretgirlsz _**for being the only people who reviewed the last two chapters. Please review, it makes me happy :D**


	15. Mr Crepsley is Pedobear

**I was actually going to update ages ago but I kept on getting distracted by dating sims (Damn that sexy blonde vampire by the name of Ferris!) and I'm a big fan of _Monster High _and they've just added some of the new characters that we've been waiting for since like last year to the site so I was busy trolling the new features. But anyway, it's here now so enjoy :D**

**Disclaimer:**

SL: I don't love Steve anymore, Kurda is my new love.

Evra: Really?

SL: Yes.

Evra: Then I guess I can let you out of this cage... *unlocks it*

SL: *Runs out and grabs Steve* Sucker! You can finally have your pot roast, Stevey-poo.

Chibi Steve: Yay!

SL: But seriously, I do love Kurda now. Just not as much as Steve.

Kurda: *Pops up out of nowhere* Where am I? How did I get here? WHERE IS MY MAN PURSE? *Spazzes*

SL: Just do the disclaimer, Kurda.

Kurda: Where is my man purse? I am nothing without my man purse!

SL: *Sighs* Fine, you do it, Evra.

Evra: Yay! SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

* * *

Daryl smiled triumphantly as she lifted Xan's pillow to reveal a small glass container.

"What a simple hiding place, why didn't I think of that before?" She muttered to herself.

She took the lid off of the container and just as she was about to take a swig, a hot and sweaty snake-boy ran into her, knocking the glass container out of her hand. It hit the floor and shattered into a million pieces.

"Evra!" She cried.

"Oops, sorry." Evra said.

"'Oops, sorry'? That potion was supposed to change me back into a boy!" Daryl cried. "And what are you doing in here anyway?"

"I need you to pretend to be my girlfriend." Evra announced.

"What? Why?"

"Just do it, please?"

Daryl sighed. "Fine."

As if on cue, a very aggravated-looking Steve entered the tent without even bothering to ask for permission. He took one look at Evra and frowned even more than he already was.

"Darren? That _thing _isn't your boyfriend, is he?"

Daryl looked at Evra. Evra shot her back a pleading look. She sighed mentally. "Yes, Evra is my boyfriend."

Suddenly Steve stopped looking angry. He just looked sad. Very, very sad. He turned around and stalked out of the tent without a word. Daryl watched him leave, a look of worry spread across her face. When he was gone, she turned to Evra.

"What did you do?" She asked.

"Please don't get mad," Evra pleaded. "I kind of told Steve you were my girlfriend."

"Why?" Daryl cried.

"He was being a jerk and…ah, I don't know! It just slipped out! I'm sorry!"

Daryl sighed. "It's okay, I'll forgive you for that but I'm still awfully upset about you destroying my chances of ever being a boy again."

"Daryl," Evra whispered, cupping the raven-haired girl's face in his hands. "Why do you want to be a boy again so badly?"

"Why do you want me to stay a girl so badly?" Daryl retorted.

Evra chuckled. "You still haven't figured it out?"

"Figured what out?"

Evra had rehearsed this scene a thousand times over in his head. He would tell Daryl that he loved her and place a soft kiss on her lips. Then they would pull away and Daryl would smile and say that she loved him back, but of course things didn't work out quite the way he had planned.

"Charna's guts! Who the hell are you?"

"That's Mr. Crepsley!" Daryl exclaimed before running out of the tent to see what had caused the shout. Evra sighed and followed her.

"What's wrong, Mr. Crepsley? We heard you shout." Daryl said.

Mr. Crepsley didn't respond, he was frozen with fear. Daryl turned to Xan who was twirling in circles and Xina who looked quite frightened too, but not as much as Mr. Crepsley.

"What happened?" Daryl asked again.

"That crazy girl tried to rape me!" Mr. Crepsley shouted before Xina could say anything.

"She did what?" Evra laughed. Daryl elbowed him. "Ow!"

"She kissed him." Xina clarified.

"Really?" Daryl gasped.

"Yes! And now I am scarred for life!" Mr. Crepsley moaned.

"It's not her fault, Mr. Crepsley," Daryl explained. "I gave her coffee by mistake and it makes her do weird stuff."

"Well, I hope that you will not give her coffee by mistake again." Mr. Crepsley huffed before storming off in a sulk. Evra just laughed again, earning him another elbow in the ribs from Daryl.

It was quiet then. Xan stopped twirling. She looked at Daryl, then at Xina, then at Evra, then back at Daryl again.

"Daryl? What's going on?" She asked.

"Is she back to normal?" Daryl whispered to Xina.

"Hey, I can hear you, you know! And what do you mean, am I back to normal?" Xan enquired.

"She's definitely back." Evra murmured.

"Hello! Can someone answer my question?" Xan shouted. "All I remember is drinking coffee and then…" She grinned. "Everything turned magical."

Daryl, Evra and Xina just stared at her. She stared back. Daryl was the first to speak.

"The coffee made you hyper," She explained. "You did a lot of…interesting things."

"Interesting?" Xan narrowed her eyes. "Interesting how?"

"Well, you made a waterfall out of my drink…" Xina answered.

"And you showed me your panties…" Daryl added.

"And you kissed Mr. Crepsley!" Evra laughed. Daryl elbowed him again.

Xan's eyes widened in horror. "I seriously did all that stuff?"

Daryl nodded.

"I've got to get more of that stuff!" Xan beamed.

"No!" Everyone shouted quickly.

"…Just kidding."


	16. Lover Boy

**So, I promised I'd update all of my fics today in honor of how excited I was for Haunt the Halls: Monster High Day but today was actually a big let down. But a promise is a promise so I did update all my fics, including the Sam Grest one that's on hiatus. And I'll also have a _Monster High _oneshot up later, also in honor of Haunt the Halls. Oh, and for Haunt the Halls you're supposed to cosplay as your favourite monster so I cosplayed as Daryl with cat ears XD I can send you the link if anyone wants to see it.**

**Disclaimer:**

SL: *Sits in emo corner, growing mushrooms*

Chibi Steve: What's wrong with her?

Evra: She was excepting her favourite character to make an apperance in the special Friday the 13th episode of _Monster High _but he didn't show up.

Chibi Steve: Hey, SL-nee-sama, if you're so upset about him not appearing in the episode then why don't you just bring him here?

SL: That's a good idea, Stevey-poo! And SL-nee-sama said, "Let there be Holt!"

Holt: Where am I? Hey, it's daytime! I'm not supposed to exist in daytime!

SL: But this is daytime in Fanfiction World.

Holt: Ahh.

SL: I am now your master and you must refer to me as SL-nee-sama. Now, do the disclaimer.

Holt: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. Nor does she own me, I'm from the _Monster High _line by Mattel.

SL: Good boy. Here's some chicken wings.

* * *

"The Cirque is moving on today," Daryl said. "Xina, are you coming?"

"No, I think I'll head back home. There's no use me being here." Xina shrugged.

Evra frowned.

"That's too bad. You're welcome to come see us anytime though." Daryl replied.

"Speak for yourself." Xan muttered but everyone ignored her.

"Hey, has anybody seen Steve?" Daryl asked.

"I haven't seen him since last night," Evra responded. "Why?"

"I'm worried about him," When she saw the guilty look on Evra's face she quickly added on: "But I'm sure he's fine."

"Yeah," Evra murmured.

Just then, the grey-haired boy appeared, looking as if yesterday's events had never happened. He had a blue-haired boy under one arm and a glass bottle under the other.

"This is some kid I found trolling the Cirque," Steve explained. "Let's play Spin the Bottle!"

Spin the Bottle is random. No-one knows where the bottle will end up so Steve would never play it unless there was a 100% change he would end kissing Darren. Before the game had started, he had put a magnet inside of the bottle and put a giant paper clip in his pocket so when it was Darren's turn, the bottle had to stop at him. Take that, Evra.

Everyone, including the nameless blue-haired boy, was now sat in a circle around the bottle. When Darren shyly asked who should go first, Evra and Xan both encouraged him to, both thinking that they'd actually get a shot at kissing him. Both of them glared at Steve with an obvious look of jealousy when the bottle stopped in front of him. Steve just laughed.

"Close your eyes." He said.

Darren blushed. "O-okay,"

Without a second thought, Steve smacked his lips against the half-vampire's, having waited too long already for their first kiss. Darren kissed back, but not as forcefully. After a while, the two broke away for air. Neither of them said anything after that. They just blushed and tried not to look each other in the eye.

"My go!" Evra announced, taking the bottle from the centre and spinning it before anyone else even had the chance to think.

Steve realized much too late that he still had the paperclip in his pocket and that the magnet was still in the bottle. He realized just when the bottle froze in front of him.

"No way am I kissing him!" Both Evra and Steve shouted in unison.

"But you have to," Xan replied. "It's the rules of the game."

"But it's supposed to go boy-girl." Steve argued.

"Well, this time it's boy-boy so get lip-smacking, Lover Boy!" Xan grinned.

Steve narrowed his eyes at her but there was nothing he could do. "L-let's just get this over with."

The two then leaned forward and just as their lips were about to touch, Xan cried,

"Oh, and you have to kiss him for as long as you kissed Daryl!"

Steve screwed up his face at that but he had no choice. The two boys began kissing.

_This is gross._ Steve thought. _This is vile. This is absolutely horrible. This is…this isn't actually all that bad._

The two of them broke away when the time limit was up but Steve thought he probably could've gone on kissing Evra much longer.

_Ew, no. What am I thinking? I just kissed Evra, for crying out loud!_

He then made a big show of complaining about how gross it was and how he never wanted to kiss another snake-boy for as long as he lived. He thought he saw a look of surprise on Evra's face for a moment but it was gone as quickly as it came. Soon Evra was complaining about how terrible a kisser Steve was too.

"I-I don't want to play anymore." Steve grumbled before leaving the group.

"Me neither." Evra agreed. He too ran off but in a different direction to Steve.


	17. BDDTTD

**I was super bored so I felt like updating today. You will also get a chapter tomorrow because I don't have lessons as it's my birthday (I'm homeschooled). I didn't get a single present and most of the people at my "party" didn't even know it was my birthday. But that's enough complaining. Here are a few people I would like to thank:**

Ozuma thy Awesome

ferretgirlsz

sandy162

LartenCrepsleyForeva123

Queen NekoChan

**You people are the best. Your reviews make me feel like I'm not such a loser afterall. Also, thanks to anyone else who reviews, or adds this to favourites or alert. Even you people who read and then run off like ninjas without reviewing or anything.**

**Disclaimer:**

SL: *Is cuddling Holt in the background*

Steve: *Growling*

Evra: What's the matter, Stevey-poo? Jealous cuz you're not SL-nee-sama's favourite anymore?

Steve: No! I still am! *Walks up to us* Hey, SL-nee-sama!

SL: Oh, Holt! You're so hot! (This is actually a really bad joke, look up Holt Hyde if you don't get it)

Steve: *Growls*

SL: Oh, sorry, Steve. Did you say something?

Steve: Nothing, just that SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan_, any of it's characters or Holt Hyde.

SL: Oh, okay. *Goes back to swooning over Holt*

* * *

Evra was sat on the grass with his arms folded. He was pouting like a child who hadn't gotten his way. Daryl and Xan were watching him. Daryl looked concerned; Xan was trying her best not to laugh.

"Evra, what's wrong?" Daryl enquired.

"Well, first of all, I kissed _Steve _yesterday," He made a gagging noise. "Plus I miss Xina."

Xan face-palmed dramatically but she was ignored.

"You really liked her, huh?" Daryl was grinning but Evra could see the look of jealousy in her eyes that most people would've missed.

"Yeah, but I like you more." Evra winked, only half-joking.

Daryl blushed and giggled. "I like you too, honey."

Now it was Evra's turn to blush.

Xan made a gagging noise, similar to the one Evra had made earlier.

A few seconds later, Steve approached them – walking as if he were drunk. He had a black book in his hand and he looked as if he was about to collapse. Then he did. Right in front of them. No-one moved for a while, until Xan nudged him with her foot. Then he sprang to his feet and cried out,

"They're coming for me!"

"Who are coming for you?" Daryl questioned.

"The sparkly vampires!" Steve replied. "They're coming! They're coming!"

Daryl eased the book out of Steve's hand. She gasped in horror when she saw the cover. There were a pair of hands cupped around a red apple and at the top of the book in white letters, it said 'Twilight'. Daryl nearly collapsed herself.

"What's wrong, Daryl?" Xan asked.

"It's…it's…" She stammered. "It's Twilight!"

Evra and Xan gasped just as Daryl had. Steve just looked frightened. His eyes were wide and he kept looking around him, making sure that there were no sparkly vampires trying to sneak up on him.

"Maybe we should take you to Mr. Crepsley," Daryl said, trying to grab Steve's arm.

"Is he a sparkly vampire?" Steve asked.

"No, at least I hope not."

* * *

"Just as I thought, it is BDDTTD," Mr. Crepsley announced.

"BDDTTD?" Daryl echoed.

"Brain Damage Due To Twilight Disorder," Mr. Crepsley explained. "It occurs when one reads a Twilight book or watches a Twilight movie."

"Oh, God!" Evra cried. "There are movies too?"

"It has a different effect on everyone," Mr. Crepsley went on. "Some go crazy like Steve has, others become obsessed little wannabe Goths and start screaming about whether they are Team Edward or Team Jacob."

Xan finally looked up from the book she'd been reading for the last couple of minutes. "Did someone say Team Jacob? 'Cause I think I heard someone say Team Jacob."

"Oh, STFU, Xan! It's all about Team Edward!" Steve retorted.

Daryl gasped. "Oh, no! They've both crossed over to the dark side!" Then she turned to Mr. Crepsley. "What do we do now?"

Mr. Crepsley shook his head. "There is no hope for them now. Our best bet is to run and save ourselves."

"Come on, Evra! Run before they get you too!" Daryl yelled.

"I'm right behind you!"

Mr. Crepsley turned to the poor damned souls. He shook his head pityingly and muttered something about how glad he was to be illiterate before residing to his coffin.

"Jacob is so much sexier than Edward!"

"How dare you? Vampires are better than wolves!"

"He isn't a vampire, he's a fairy!"

"Oh, no, you didn't!"

"Oh, yes, I did!"


	18. Truth or Dare

**Yay! Happy birthday to me~! I was actually kind of depressed but then I got some super sweet reviews on the last chapter that made me blush to say the least. But the one person who completely cheered me up was **_sandy162. _**She wrote a oneshot for me when all of my real life friends didn't even care enough to give me a piece of paper that said 'happy birthday' on it XD Thankyou again, for like the 1000th time - I don't know how I can repay you D:**

**Also, I liked to beg someone - _anyone -_ to just go back and review my last fic, The Random Adventures of Darren Shan XD You don't even have to read it, it doesn't even have to be a serious review just someone review it please because it's had 49 reviews for like decades now and it's annoying me that it still hasn't reached 50 XD I'm actually tempted to review it myself just so I can get to 50. Anyway, le disclaimer time~**

**Disclaimer:**

Holt: Happy birthday, SL-nee-sama~!

SL: Oh, thanks, Holt-xiao-tu! (This doesn't fit him like it does Stevey-poo XD)

Chibi Steve: What did you just call him?

SL: Huh? Did you say something, Steve?

Chibi Steve: Xiao tu is my nickname, goddammit! *Attacks Holt*

SL: Steve, what did I say about violence? And I thought you hated it when I called you that!

Chibi Steve: *Stops beating up Holt* I did but *sniffs* I miss you, SL-nee-sama.

SL: *Clicks fingers and Holt disappears*

Chibi Steve: *Grins and hugs SL-nee-sama* You do realize I'll be back to normal by the next chapter though, right?

SL: I know, but I'll just enjoy this sweet you while I can.

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan_ or any of it's characters. And she most certainly doesn't own that idiot, Holt Hyde.

* * *

"Thanks for not giving up on me when I got BDDTTD, Darren." Steve was saying.

"No problem. I couldn't just leave you to become one of them. Although Xan, I couldn't save." Both of them turned to Xan, who was avidly reading Breaking Dawn. "How did she get through the whole Twilight series in less than a day?"

Steve covered his ears. "Don't say that word!"

Daryl laughed. "Sorry, honey." Neither of them said anything for a moment. "Hey, Steve?"

Steve turned to look at his old friend. "Hmm?

"I've always been curious about why you still call me Darren? Everyone else calls me Daryl now."

Steve blushed slightly. "I don't know," He shrugged. "I guess it's because we've been friends for so long and I can't really get used to calling you Daryl. Why? Does it bother you?"

"No, just wondering."

"Erm, Darren?"

"Yeah?"

"I-I…"

Xan screamed.

"What's wrong?" Daryl cried, a look of worry in her eyes.

"I finished it!"

"Go read some other cheesy dark romance vampire book then." Steve murmured, looking annoyed.

"There are more?" Xan exclaimed, her eyes lighting up.

Just then Evra approached and slumped down next to Daryl.

"I'm bored!" He announced.

"Aren't we all?" Steve agreed. Then he grinned cheekily when he got an idea. "Let's play Truth or Dare."

"I'm extremely scared by that look on your face but since I have nothing better to do then I will play with you." Daryl said.

"Ditto," Evra added.

"I guess I can play for a little while," Xan said, smirking at Daryl.

Daryl quickly averted her eyes from the witch. "So, who goes first?"

"You!" Steve, Evra and Xan all cried.

"This is a lot like the time we all played Spin the Bottle," Daryl muttered.

"So, Darren, truth or dare?" Steve asked quickly before anyone else could.

Daryl was too scared to pick dare, remembering the dare games she and Steve used to play as children so she went with truth, hoping that Steve wouldn't ask her something embarrassing and personal.

"Who do you have a crush on?"

Daryl's face turned scarlet. "Can I change to dare?"

"Alright," Steve winked. "I dare you to make out with me."

Daryl rolled her eyes at the silver-haired boy. "Fine, I'll do it."

Evra and Xan both narrowed their eyes at Steve as Daryl leaned into kiss him. Evra folded his arms and focused on the ground and Xan re-read the back cover of Breaking Dawn as Steve and Daryl kissed in a very sexual manner in front of them.

"Okay, that's enough!" Xan yelled after a while, pulling Daryl away from the smirking teenager. "Who's going next?"

"I think you should go, Xan," Daryl smiled.

"O-okay," Xan replied, unable to resist the raven-haired girl's cuteness.

"Truth or dare?" Evra enquired.

"Dare," Xan answered, grinning fearlessly.

"Okay…" Evra paused while he thought up a dare for his enemy. "I dare you to strip down to your underwear and run round the Cirque screaming, 'Evra is the best!'."

"No way am I doing that!" Xan exclaimed.

"Why? Are you too chicken?" Evra teased.

"No, of course not!" Xan spat, pulling off her skin-tight black dress. She jumped to her feet and gave Daryl a small smile before continuing with her dare. As she ran around in her black bra and panties, a few heads were turned but weirder things had happened at the Cirque du Freak.

After having circled the Cirque once, Xan plopped down in her seat on the floor and pulled her dress back on.

"Alright, it's your turn now, Evra," She announced. She hurried on without even waiting for any input by the snake-boy. "Truth or dare?

"Dare," Evra replied, accepting the silent challenge that Xan had placed before him.

"I dare you to confess your love to Mr. Crepsley."

"No way!" Evra shouted.

"Why? Are you too chicken?" Xan smirked, repeating the question the snake-boy had asked her earlier.

Evra just grunted and stood up. He made his way to Mr. Crepsley's tent with Xan, Evra and Steve close behind. They waited outside the tent as he entered and knocked on Mr. Crepsley's coffin.

"This better be good!" Mr. Crepsley groaned. "Waking me up in the middle of the day…" He froze when he got a look at Evra. "Evra? What is it you want?"

"I just wanted to tell you that…" He shot a look of annoyance at Xan who was outside the tent. She gave him a thumbs up. "I love you."

"What?" Mr. Crepsley gasped. "Is this some kind of joke?"

Evra ran out of the old vampire's tent before he could ask any more questions. He sighed. "Your go, Steve. Truth or dare?"

"Dare," Steve answered.

Xan and Evra were both silent as they tried to think up a dare for Steve but everything, it seemed, Steve would be able to do, no problem.

"Can't think of a dare for me, eh?" Steve laughed.

"No," Evra admitted.

"Alright, I'll switch to truth."

"Um, okay…" Evra paused to think of something to ask Steve but Xan beat him to it.

"Was your kiss with Evra good?"

Steve turned a deep shade of red that Daryl hadn't seen since the time he had walked in on her getting changed when they were kids (Of course, she had been a he then).

"Well?" Xan pushed.

"M-maybe a little…" Steve stammered.

Xan burst out laughing, Evra was blushing just as deeply as Steve was and Daryl was just looking very uncomfortable.

"I think that's enough for today," She announced before leaving the laughing girl and the two embarrassed boys.


	19. What's Yaoi?

**Disclaimer:**

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters. She also doesn't own any of the books referenced in this chapter.

Evra: You're doing the disclaimer again? T_T

Chibi Steve: SL-nee-sama isn't here so since I'm her second in command, I decided to take over.

Evra: Where is she anyway?

Chibi Steve: You'll find out in today's chapter.

* * *

"Today we are writing our own chapter because SL-nee-sama's a bit…" Steve shot the others a look that meant 'crazy'.

"Why? What's wrong with her?" Daryl asked, her voice full of concern.

"See for yourself."

Daryl, Xan and Evra all hopped to their feet and followed Steve out of the tent. They peered into the tent next to theirs and saw SL, staring obsessively at a computer screen while chomping on cheese.

"SL-nee-sama?" Daryl called.

SL looked up from the computer screen and smiled her creepy witch smile at her 'children'. (**A/N ***Cough* Whores *cough*)

"Hey, guys," She said. "What's up?"

"Are you…okay?" Daryl asked shyly.

SL shook her head sadly.

"Why? What's wrong?" Daryl cried.

"Yesterday…" SL began.

"Yesterday…?" Daryl pushed.

"Yesterday I…"

"Yesterday, you what?"

"Yesterday I was kidnapped by a bunch of yaoi fangirls!"

Everyone gasped, especially Steve. He rushed over to his poor master.

"What did they do to you?" He exclaimed. "Did they torture you? Did they infect you?" He paused to gasp again. "Are you…one of them now?"

"Yes, yes, and no…" SL answered. "Well, at least not yet anyway. I'm loosing pieces of my sanity bit by bit. I just read a yaoi incest fanfiction about the _Suite Life _and I don't even like the _Suite Life_!"(**A/N **I actually did read a fic like this)

"Derp," Xan muttered but she was ignored as usual.

"We need to get you to a doctor!" Steve yelled.

"What kind of doctor cures people of pervertedness?" Evra enquired.

"Is that even a word?" Daryl responded.

"According to my spell check, it's not." SL answered.

"That's not the point! The point is SL-nee-sama is about to go over to the dark side!" Steve shouted.

"I thought _Twilight_ was the dark side." Evra muttered.

"Hey! Don't say that about my _Twilight_!" Xan retorted.

"Shut up, both of you!" Steve commanded. "You know that word does things to me! Anyway, what do we do about SL-nee-sama?"

"Nothing," Xan replied nonchalantly. "We just get comfortable in our tents with some coffee and a coupe of dark romance books. I call the _House of Night _series! Erik is such a bishie!"

"This is why you're my least favourite OC," SL growled.

"I know! She's so mean!" Evra agreed.

"Not because she's mean, because she's an Erik fangirl. It's all about Stark! And Jack and Damien make such a lovely couple. Yaoi." SL clamped a hand over her mouth when she realized what she had said. "Oh, no, Stevey-poo! It's happening! I'm becoming…" Suddenly her voice turned deep and quite creepy. "A yaoi fangirl."

Everyone backed away from her.

"SL-nee-sama?" Steve whispered.

"I'm not SL-nee-sama anymore, I'm NarutoxSasukeFan4evs123."

"Okay, great," Steve lied. "Come on, let's get out of here!"

* * *

"So, what do we do about her?" Steve asked.

"Maybe we should ask Mr. Crepsley," Daryl suggested. "He seems to know a lot about these weird diseases."

Xan blushed with embarrassment at the mention of Mr. Crepsley's name. "You guys do that, I'm going to go read _The Vampire Diaries." _And with that, she was gone.

* * *

"What is yaoi?"

Daryl had just explained what had happened to Mr. Crepsley. Now they were all standing in his tent awkwardly, trying to figure out a way to explain to the old vampire what yaoi was.

"Er…"

"It's gay porn!" Steve explained before Daryl could say anything.

At that moment, Mr. Crepsley became mentally scarred and was never the same again. It happens to us all when we first discover yaoi.

Mr. Crepsley coughed uncomfortably. "Oh, is that so? Well, I do not think I will be able to help you then. Please leave my tent immediately."

The three obeyed, not knowing that as soon as they left, Mr. Crepsley rushed to the store to buy some yaoi DVDs.


	20. AntiWriters Block

**My writing's been a little poopy lately. The last chapter is proof of that. So let's just pretend that the last chapter never happened and everything is back to normal 8D I know, I'm a derp. Beware, there is a lot of self-bashing and _Twilight _bashing in this chapter XD**

**Disclaimer:**

Steve: Wait, I'm confused. So you're not a yaoi fangirl anymore?

SL: Nope. So who's doing the disclaimer? I'll let you fight over it.

Daryl: Hey, no fighting! I'm a girl - I'm fragile!

Steve: You can do it, Darren.

Daryl: Hehehe~ SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

SL: You fell for her trap, man.

Steve: Damn.

* * *

"Our last chapter was sucky," Xan announced.

"I know, you don't need to tell me." SL murmured in response.

"Why?" Xan asked.

"Because I'm an average writer!" S.L. cried in annoyance.

"Well, we all know that," Xan agreed.

S.L. went into her emo corner to sulk. "Why must I be average or bellow at everything I do? And why must you be so mean?"

"Because you made me this way, I'm your OC remember." Xan pointed out.

"I know but still!" SL. Replied, kicking her legs in frustration. "I'm tempted to send you back to your parents just so I can replace you with a nice OC."

"You had a nice OC but you got rid of her." Xan reminded her.

"I know but she was too nice," S.L. frowned. "See! I'm so average I can't even create interesting OCs! Next thing you know we'll have Mary Sues running all over the place!"

"Yeah, your OCs suck," Xan agreed. "Female Darren is nothing like male Darren, she's too cutesy. And remember Nameless OC? What a loser."

"Shut up or I'll pair you with him." S.L. retorted.

Xan frowned. "I'm only telling the truth."

"I know you are," S.L. huffed. "That's what makes it so sad!"

"Quit your blubbering, aren't you supposed to be my creator?" Xan said.

"Yes, and you're my worst creation by the way. Even worse than the overly nice Xina and the cutesy Daryl."

"Whatever," Xan shrugged. "But seriously, you better get your writing skills back or people will stop being interested. Even if your writing is average."

S.L. blew a raspberry at the red-haired girl. "It's not like this fic was all that popular to begin with, it's just a plotless story people read for the fun of it."

Xan slapped her creator upside the head. "Oh, quit being so emo!"

"Oh, I'm emo? I'm not the one who reads _Twilight_!" S.L. replied.

"Reading _Twilight _makes you emo?" Xan questioned.

"Well, not really," S.L. admitted. "Apparently it's mostly read by wannabe emos though."

"How do you know so much about _Twilight_?" Xan enquired.

"I-I used to be a Twifag too," S.L. admitted bashfully.

"No-one can resist the awesomeness that is _Twilight_!" Xan exclaimed triumphantly. "Were you Team Edward or Team Jacob?"

"I was originally Team Edward but I switched to Team Jacob when I realized how much of a twat he was." S.L. explained.

"Hey! My Edward is not a twat!" Xan spat.

"Whatever," S.L. shrugged. "Let's just end this chapter before it turns into another _Twilight _rant."

"Okay," Xan said. "Bye my beautiful fans!"

"You have no fans," S.L. chuckled. "All of the reviewers hate you or just don't feel any way about you."

Xan pouted. "Well, I hate you all too."

"Yeah, Xan, no-one cares."


	21. Confessions

**This fic will be ending soon because I think I've dragged it on for too long. Also I've promised to do a sequel to my last fic, The Random Adventures of Darren Shan, plus I'm currently writing 30 Ways to Annoy Darren Shan Characters and The Saga of Sam Grest and I've been asked to continue my _Monster High_ fic. So, yeah, a lot of fic writing. **

**Disclaimer:**

Daryl: SL-nee-sama doesn't own-

Steve: She goes by Boss now.

Evra: She does?

SL: You can call me whatever.

Xan: Poopy Face doesn't own-

SL: Anything nice!

Mr. Crepsley: What am I doing here?

SL: I wanted everyone to be in this chapter's disclaimer ;D

Xina: Hey, everyone~!

Evra: XINAAAAA!

Daryl: SL-nee-sama doesn't own-

Steve: Hey, Daryl! You did it last chapter! It's my turn!

Crepsley: I'm surronded by idiots!

Evra: I missed you, Xina!

Xan: Oh, great! _She's _back!

Nameless OC: Wow, this is a hella long disclaimer.

SL: You're right! I don't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters!

Everyone: *Stares at me*

SL: Well, you were taking too long!

* * *

"Where was I last chapter?" Evra asked.

"Where was _I_?" Daryl cried. "I mean, I am the main character after all."

"But I'm the Boss' waifu*_._" Steve frowned. (**A/N **It took my spell check quite a while to realize 'waifu' isn't a word XD)

"I was in the last chapter!" Xan boasted. "Maybe that means that the Boss likes me better than all of you."

Everyone laughed.

"Come on, Xan. You know that's not true." Daryl said.

Xan pouted and folded her arms. "So anyway, what are we doing this chapter? If nobody's thought of anything then I'd be happy to return to my tent and read _Twilight._"

"Actually, Xan, I wanted to ask you something…" Daryl's voice trailed off as she considered what to say next.

"Of course I'll marry you!" Xan exclaimed before the raven-haired girl could say anything.

Daryl chuckled. "That's not what I wanted to ask you."

"Good, because Xan would be in for a very painful future if it was." Steve muttered darkly.

Daryl looked at the boy next to her disapprovingly for a moment but said nothing. "Anyway," She continued. "What I wanted to ask you was if you could change me back into a boy. I mean, it's been pretty fun sharing a tent with you and all but I don't think I can get used to this. We can still be friends if you change me back, I promise. Please, Xan. It would mean a lot to me."

Everyone was silent for a moment. Daryl and Evra were looking hopeful; both for different reasons while Steve didn't care either way. Suddenly Xan looked up and muttered one syllable,

"Fine."

Daryl's face lit up. "Really?"

Xan smiled. "Really. But only if you're 100% sure. There might be someone keeping you from making the decision."

"What do you mean by that?" Daryl enquired.

Xan shot a look at Evra that meant: _This is your chance, Snakey! Say something before it's too late! _Somehow the snake-boy understood. He took a step towards Daryl and grabbed both her hands.

"Daryl," He breathed. "I love you."

He leaned into kiss the girl of his dreams like in his fantasies but was pushed out of the way by a jealous Steve.

"I love you too, Darren," The grey-haired boy purred. "But I don't care whether you're a boy or a girl."

By now Daryl's face was as red as a tomato. She didn't think it could get any worse until Xan put a hand on her shoulder and whispered,

"I love you too."

She looked at Xan, then at Steve, then Evra. She thought about how close she was to each of them. Would her being a boy or a girl change all that? Steve said he didn't care, but what about Evra and Xan? She loved her friends; she didn't want to lose them over something as stupid as what gender she was.

"I-I don't know what to say." She murmured.

"You don't have to choose right now," Xan said.

"Yeah, and forget about I said," Evra told her. "I love you and you do make a cute girl but if you want to be a boy again, it's your choice."

"I don't have anything dramatic to say so…" Steve gave Daryl an extra long kiss on the lips. Xan could've sworn she saw some tongue.

"So what? You can kiss her and I can't?" Evra whined.

"Yes," Steve grinned. "Anyway, readers, all of you have to vote. Do you want Darren to stay a girl, or should he turn back into a boy? And should he end up with me? Or one of those two? It's no competition really."

"What's that supposed to me?" Evra growled.

"Well, only one reader likes Xan. And you, well, you're just you." Steve explained.

"Someone likes me?" Xan gasped.

"Someone likes Xan?" Evra echoed, earning him a slap from Xan.

"I know, it was a surprise to me and the Boss too," Steve stated.

"Let's just end this chapter!" Xan shouted.

"Right. So, vote or the Boss and I will hunt you down. And you better vote me." Steve concluded.

"Or, if he's a little scary for you, you can always vote me." Evra added.

"Or me. I'm adorable." Xan smirked.

"Say something, Darren!" Steve commanded.

"Something, Darren."

* * *

*Waifu = Engrish for 'wife' XD Yes, Steve is my waifu even though he's male FTW


	22. Decision Part 1

**Disclaimer:**

SL: I noticed that in the last chapter, Mr. Crepsley said "I'm surronded by idiots" instead of "I am". Seba would not be very pleased with you, Larten.

Larten: Hey! You are the one that typed it! Not me!

Seba: Tut, tut, tut, Larten.

Larten: *Grumbles*

SL: Seba, you do the disclaimer.

Seba: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

Larten: You just said 'doesn't'! Tut, tut, tut, Seba!

Seba: Larten, do not disrespect your mentor!

I bet you can tell I've been reading _The Saga of Larten Crepsley _rescently XD I have a feeling that Wester's going to die because I like him and my favourite characters always die T_T

* * *

A while ago I was just getting used to my life as a half-vampire. Then I turned into a girl, now 3 of my best friends have confessed their love to me. I feel like a Mary Sue.

I've been given the opportunity to become a boy again. I should take it – it's what I've wanted all this time. But what if everything goes back to normal if I do? I love rooming with Xan and all the mix-ups she and the others get me into.

But do I love her? As a friend, sure. But when she said she loved me I know she meant as much more than a friend. Steve and Evra too. How do I feel about the two of them?

I feel stupid for not realizing their feelings earlier - Xan and Evra were obviously jealous when Steve kissed me…and why would Steve kiss me like that if he didn't love me?

Ahh, I don't know. I'm so confused. I think I'll get some sleep and talk to them when I wake up.

* * *

So I gave you all a week to vote. Thankyou all for voting! I got reviews from a lot of people outside of my usual circle XD But guess what? It was a tie -_- Between Steve and Xan. So the next person to review is the winning vote and will decide the outcome for this story. I'll get on the next chapter as soon as someone reviews. Thankyou all ^_^

**Male Darren or female Darren?**

Female – 0

Male – 6

No preference - 2

**Who should Darren/Daryl end with?**

Steve – 4

Xan – 4

Evra – 1

None – 1

No preference – 0


	23. Decision Part 2

And the winning vote was _Ozuma thy Awesome. _When I saw it I was all like "Why must you be a Xan fan? Why? Why?" but in a way I was happy cuz I'd already half-written an ending with Xan. I was going to write an ending for each character and then upload whichever you all choose and then have the rest as "alternate endings" but I never got around to it. And to _lyokodreamer _and _ILovePepsi2, _sorry but you two were just a little bit late D;

**Disclaimer:**

Daryl: I can't believe we're ending!

Steve: I know, right? I only came in recently!

Xan: At least the author liked you.

Evra: Well, maybe she'd like you too if you were a little nicer.

Xina: Yeah, Xan. You can be a little on the mean side.

Mr. Crepsley: I am here _again?_

Nameless OC: Yay! I'm here for once!

Kurda: I'm happy now cuz SL-nee-sama got me a new man purse! It's so much prettier than my old one! Look, it's so pink~!

Crepsley: I always knew you were gay.

Steve: Darren, what'd you think I'd look like with blonde hair like Kurda's?

Daryl: Gay.

Xan: Ditto.

Evra: What's wrong with blonde hair?

Xina: Your hair isn't blonde, Evra-poo. It's green-ish blonde.

Evra: Same difference.

Crepsley: Would someone just do the disclaimer already?

Seba: There is no need to shout, Larten! Hey, with all this talk of dying hair, do you think I should dye mine? How about magenta?

Daryl: Actually, Seba, I think fuschia would suit you better.

Evra: What's the difference between fuschia and magenta?

Xan: I don't know. They're both pink!

SL: IT'S EFFIN' FUSCHIA! (Reference to Kingdom Days) Anyway, someone do the disclaimer please. Larten, you look game.

Crespley: Do I have to?

SL: Yes, you do.

Crespely: SL-nee-sama doesn't own _The Saga of Darren Shan _or any of it's characters.

* * *

I opened my eyes to see Xan sitting next to me, watching me with a loving look in her eyes. I sat up and smiled at her.

"Hey, Xan," I said.

"Hey, Daryl," She replied, not looking me in the eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

There was an awkward silence.

"So, have you made a decision yet?" She asked.

I shook my head.

"Sorry if I'm rushing you…" She muttered.

"It's alright," I shrugged. "But what do you think I should do?"

"To be honest, I don't care," She admitted. "Since you said you'd still be my friend, even if I changed you back. But if it would make you happy being a boy then I think you should do that and also, maybe then we could...be together." She said the last words so softly I almost missed them.

I was silent for a moment, considering my next words carefully.

"Alright," I announced. "Change me back."

She nodded happily and pulled a bottle out from underneath her pillow.

"You mean you still kept it in the same place, even after I found it last time?" I grumbled but she just laughed and handed the container to me.

I looked at the bottle in my hand, then at Xan, then back at the bottle. I thought about Evra and Steve. This was my last change. If I drank this liquid then I'd be a boy again and I couldn't be with Evra or Steve. I could be with Xan though. Is that what I wanted?

"If you're still not sure then I can give you some more time." She said softly.

I shook my head to clear it then I brought the bottle to my lips and finished the whole potion with one big gulp. The next thing I knew, my huge breasts were gone and my _thing_ turned back into that other _thing_.

I smiled at Xan and she smiled back. Then she did something I never would have expected…

_She kissed me._

* * *

Steve and I peered at Darren – now male again – kissing Xan. _Xan. _Suddenly I was overwhelmed with jealous and I wanted to punch Xan in the face. Then I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. I turned around.

"_Xina?" _I gasped.

* * *

And that concludes Daryl Shan. Our little Evra didn't get the happy ending with Daryl he was hoping for but at least he's got Xina. But what about poor Steve? I may upload those "alternate endings" I was going on about before, one where Darren/Daryl ends up with Steve ;D Anyway, thankyou to all of you for sticking with me until now, especially my regular reviewers - you know who you are. Next up I shall be continuing The Saga of Sam Grest.


End file.
